My Manifesto (Of Sorts)

I published some hard words this week.

I had a post go live on Holl and Lane’s blog and it was about scary stuff that happens to girls. The kind of thing that happens when a girl says no to a guy and he does what he wants anyway.

I’m going to tell you to read it if you want, because I think everyone and their mom/sister/daughter/friend should be reading Holl and Lane, but in all honesty, it may not be for people who aren’t yet ready to heal from some of their own experiences. And that’s cool. But pass it on if you feel like it.


I wrote “Can We Talk About The After?” back in June, when I was safe and living in my little bubble. The place where I kept my head down and tried to get through all the hard things that were going on in my life at that time. And let me tell you, there were a lot. There is nothing like returning home as a different person only to face all the people who are upset that you’ve changed.

So I wrote about a past experience, because life is funny and that’s what kept coming up when I was faced with the topic Holl and Lane gave me for that month, which was ‘Taboo’.

The article was published 3 months later.

Which is 3 months after I am out of my safe little bubble and forcing myself to try new things.

3 months into meeting a new group of people.

3 months into new friends and new dates and new patterns and habits.

3 months into a new job, a new house, a new city.

And I’m doing it.

But having something from my past popping up this week has required me to sit still for a bit.

So these are a few of the things that came out while I took some time for myself this weekend. Maybe you can use them too.


You are exactly where you are supposed to be.

Just chill. Breathe. Calm your mind.

Stop analyzing. Just breathe and be. Laugh in the sunshine. Be part of the pulse.

Meditate on kind words.

Move people with honesty. Help them connect with the deepness inside of them by connecting with yourself first.

Do things to bring your mind back to earth. Plant yourself. Be still. Remember grace. Silence is okay. It doesn’t take anything away from you. You aren’t living less because you’re quiet.

Feel peace. Give peace. Be peace.

Offer grace when you are able to. Don’t beat yourself up if you can’t.

Take deep breaths. Come back to this.

Be part of it all. Feel the beat. You’re alive. Hear it. Remember it.

Taste and feel and breathe and cry and love. Don’t stop loving. Don’t shrink.

Stay bold. Use your brain but if it gets in the way of giving love or receiving love, then just go with your heart.

Find, seek, search. Don’t stop looking for more, but remember that you are enough already. Just add to the fullness.

Put good things out into the universe. To him and to her. Even when you’re sad.

People’s issues are not about you. You need to hear that twice. Other people’s issues are not about you.

The bigger plan is about you. The path you are on is about you. The way you make people feel is about you. But people’s issues? Not about you. People’s pain? Not about you. People’s reactions? Not about you.

You saved for this. You worked for this. You lost and you gave for this. (Do it.)

Remember the fear you felt before you wrote it all down. Remember the rushing in of grace and kindness.

Reach out. Connect. Give the goodness back but make sure you accept it too. It’s not a mistake. It’s for you. Take it in, sit still with it, pass it on.

The right people are appearing. Trust them. If you don’t think you can do that, try hugging them and see how that makes you feel. You’ll be able to tell.

It’s all about deep breaths and love and this unending cycle of taking it all in and giving it all back.

The more you let people love you, the more love you have to give. Allow it.

This is your life.




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